Kershaw forced 2016’s best hitter

Mr. Met has every right to be furious about the monster he is and the world he was born into, and yet he’s there every day, doing his best and trying to be happy. He’s asked to dress like a player, and never gets to play the game. The team has never found a hat that fits him correctly, undoubtedly leading to nasty sunburn and he’s always smiling.

It has become baseball canon that Mr. and Mrs. Met are in a loving, committed, open relationship. In 2014 this became known when Royals’ mascot, Sluggerrr, revealed that he was one of Mrs. Met’s sexual conquests.

So for Tim Tebow to hit .216 against professional baseball players, years after playing any type of organized baseball, is really impressive to me.

ON THE OTHER HAND, he’s going to turn 30 in August, and he’s hitting .216 against 20-year-olds. He has a .302 on-base percentage and .327 slugging percentage. That wouldn’t be that big of a problem if he were a 19-year-old shortstop, but he’s not. He’s a clompy 29-year-old left fielder.

He might make the majors, and he might do it for that sweet, sweet shirsey money, but he is almost certainly not good enough to make the major leagues because of his baseball skill alone.

Which brings us to our new feature: Tebow Watch Watch, in which we look at different proclamations of Tebow having turned a corner and verify the claims.

Visions of a determined pitching-god warrior trotting in from the bullpen in Game 5 on short rest after throwing twice in the series is the campfire story Nats fans will regale to their children. As Kershaw worked to change his postseason narrative, at least for stubborn media members, the Nationals reaffirmed theirs. Kershaw forced 2016’s best hitter, Daniel Murphy, to popup and coaxed a Wilmer Difo strikeout to seal the series.

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